Courageous citizen soldiers have gone to war. Spouses, children, parents and much-loved family and friends are fighting their own battles here at home. What happens to lives interrupted by deadly conflict?

A mission
of her own

While her husband serves in Iraq, she helps other military families cope

AMELIA KUNHARDT/The Patriot Ledger Solveig Sheehan stays in touch with her husband, National Guard 1st Sgt. Richard Sheehan, by e-mail and occasional phone calls.

STORY BY KAREN GOULART
THE PATRIOT LEDGER

WEYMOUTH

The phone calls at random hours of the day have all but ceased. Solveig Sheehan didn't mind taking them, but she's glad they're slowing down. It's a good sign that the callers are getting accustomed to their situation.

When the National Guard called the Sheehan home last spring, 1st Sgt. Richard Sheehan wasn't the only one activated for duty. As her husband headed for training in Mississippi May 5, Solveig started out on a mission of her own.

Armed with a plastic purple binder filled with worksheets, pamphlets with titles such as "The Media and You" and a list of names, Solveig took charge as the leader of the Family Readiness Group for Delta Company, 1st Battalion of the 181st Infantry Regiment of the Massachusetts National Guard.

In her new role, the 31-year-old intensive care nurse is an organizer, party planner, publisher and, perhaps most important of all, listener.

Calling reservists into action leaves spouses on their own and turns mothers and fathers into single parents. Sometimes they need to talk to someone who understands.

When Delta Company left for training in Mississippi, Solveig Sheehan became that someone for more than 200 families across New England.

"You try to guide them in the right direction, give them ideas," Sheehan said. "Mostly, though, they just need to vent and it's good to vent to someone. ... I like them to feel like I'm available 24/7."

For Sheehan, it was the third time she said good-bye to her husband of four years. In the course of their 12 year relationship, Richard has served in Cuba and Bosnia. He is now on his first tour in Iraq. Delta Company reached Baghdad last month.

From pride to fear, Solveig said she understands the variety of emotions felt by fellow military families.

AMELIA KUNHARDT/The Patriot Ledger Solveig Sheehan, right, helps Tonya Tyree of Lowell, center, find a National Guard T-shirt for Asaliah Mirambeaux, 4, at a Massachusetts National Guard family fun day.

"I've been through this a few times before, so I just try to help them as best I can," Sheehan said. "I hope I'm able to make them feel a little better."

As for those who have not reached out to her, Sheehan and the small group comprising her leadership team is reaching out to them.

Soon after the company left, Sheehan began mapping out activities to bring the group together and keep spirits up. She and volunteers also are working on a family group newspaper and interactive Web site.

On Saturday, there was a picnic, for October an old armory will be converted into a haunted house. November and December will bring potluck dinners and parties.

The activities' focus is on children whose parents are in the war zone, said Sheehan.

"Most of them don't quite understand what's happening," she said. "They're used to mom or dad going away one weekend a month, and now they're gone and it's kind of more permanent."

The September picnic was designed to address the fear of the unknown. Every child will receive a personal "call to duty" invitation to the picnic. In addition to activities like a rock climbing wall, they will be able to explore a variety of military vehicles.

"They'll get to see what mommy and dad are doing," Sheehan said. "We want them to be included in the whole process, we don't want them to be forgotten about."

And thanks to technology, parents will be able to check in on the kids. Now that the company is in Baghdad, getting the family Web site up and running is a top priority. The site, exclusive to soldiers and their families, is a place where people can share photos or read the Delta company newspaper.

One of the most exciting features for Sheehan will be the site's interactive section, where family members can get together in chat rooms.

The feature came about "because I wanted it," she said, laughing and jokingly pounding her fist. "You can do things like that (chat) on sites like Yahoo, but it's not secure. I want to have everything right there in one place, I want it to be easy for people to connect and vent and feel safe about raising concerns and questions."

With all the time Sheehan invests in making sure everyone else is all right, she is also finding her own way through a difficult time.

She and Richard spoke frequently when he was in Mississippi. Now that he is in Baghdad, it's back to e-mails and dealing with restrictions of phone cards and time differences. She now considers the occasional phone call a treat.

"I'm doing fine, hanging in there, I've been a little busy which is good," she said. "Now that I know he's there and getting acclimated, to hear his voice is great."